Bringing Sexy Back: 5 Natural Ways to Crank Up Your Sex Drive

It takes ten minutes on the TV or internet to see the importance of sex in our routine lives – from advertisements to movies, almost everything these days screams sex. And why not: Sex feels great, and it sells even better.

For most women, however, the reality of this can be rather different. When you’re juggling a dozen different things at work and home, it’s hard not to be too exhausted for anything but sleep, at the end of the day. Loss of desire is also common when you hit menopause, or use hormonal contraceptives. The cumulative result: Once you hit your late 30’s and head into your 40’s and 50’s, life stress and estrogen changes put your sex drive in the park. Some of us will opt for treatments during this phase; others will struggle through while navigating through relationships that start to become tenser. Either way, hold on to hope – here are five ways you can boost your sex drive, without the associated side-effects of treatments.

1. Realign your senses:

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Women who regularly focus on sharpening their senses – focusing on what they see, smell, feel and hear – report higher levels of arousal, according to the Journal of Sexual Medicine. Taking advice from head researcher Lori Brotto, we suggest choosing a snack you love and helping yourself to it each day. Focus on its scent, texture and taste. Think about the emotions it evokes. The connections it reminds you of.  This way, you’ll be able to better tune into, construct and respond to sexual experiences – whether it’s the silken feel of the sheets or the scent of melting candles, building and experiencing sexual stimulation will become easier and more enjoyable as you learn to focus on more than just ‘getting it done.’

2. Shock yourself into play!

If your idea of what leads to a great time in bed is a candlelit dinner and roses, you’re in for a surprise: we recommend scaring yourself into bed! ‘When you’re doing something [that excites or shocks you], your heart is racing and your nervous system is activated, much like they would be if you were sexually aroused,’ says Cindy Meston, PhD, who co-authored Why Women Have Sex. Remember the rush of excitement and fear that cruised through you in your first swimming or skiing lesson? Rinse and repeat! Find a little time to go paragliding. Surf for the first time. Or just book a crazy roller-coaster ride for the two of you! Do something with your partner that gives you that rush of adrenaline you’ve stopped being used to, and see your sex drive shoot up like never before.

3. Take the focus off sex:

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Whether you’re in your mid-30’s or nearing your 50th birthday, you’re probably deep into juggling a job and care giving – doing the dishes; ensuring your child doesn’t catch that pesky summer cold;  supporting a partner who might not realize he needs to help around the house. How you desire and respond to sexual stimulation will often fall during this phase, simply because you’re too exhausted for play:  when you have time, you want to relax. The good thing is, you can combine both to sharpen your dulling taste for sex. Take the focus off sex, and re-focus on stimulation that relaxes you. Facials and full-body massages are two tools that work amazingly well in this regard.

4.Help yourself to herbs:

If you haven’t felt the urge in a while, herbal extracts are a safe bet.  Suma root increases levels of estradiol-17 beta, women’s primary estrogen hormone; Tongkat Ali contains all the right elements to crank up your sexual drive; and ginger dilates your blood vessels, revving up the passage of blood cells to your sex organs.

5. Stock up on steak:

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Red meat is loaded with zinc, a libido-boosting nutrient that increases your sex drive and decreases the production of Prolactin, a hormone that can diminish libido. Certified nutritionist Esther Blum, author of Eat, Drink and Be Gorgeous, recommends helping yourself to steak – especially grass-fed beef steak – to get back into the game. Our personal recommendation is mixing and matching the different elements we’ve talked about so far, to build an incredible sexual experience. Treat yourself to a romantic candle-lit dinner for two, experience a herb-seasoned steak with all your senses, and dive into an arousing massage once you hit your place!

Kashaf Ali blogs about health and nutrition, and is passionate about providing women spaces to interact with and learn from each other. Follow her on Twitter @kashafalii

Zyana Morris is a passionate lifestyle and fashion blogger who loves to write on prevailing trends. She is featured author at various blogs around and a staff writer at AnythingChenille.com, your premier source for all your custom chenille and letterman jacket patches.

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